Adopt-a-Family

Today was the day I both look forward to and dread every year. Today was Adopt-a-Family delivery day.

Every year at SHS, homeroom classes adopt a needy family in the Kennewick area for Christmas. This is an activity that I LOVE. Each homeroom is assigned a family that is in need during the holidays. We are provided with a list of gift suggestions from the family, and then it is up to the kids to get stuff donated or purchased. Then, a week or two later, right before our Winter Break, the kids get to play Santa and deliver the gifts to the families.

It just warms my heart to see kids get excited about giving to others. Most of the time, the families that are adopted have young children. This is the first year that my class has ever gotten a family that doesn't have kids. In fact, this year, we got a single, elderly lady by the name of Phyllis. No kids at all. At first my seniors were disappointed. They like to get stuff for the little kids. I don't blame them, kids are usually the most fun to shop for. But they rallied together and decided they were going to give this lady the best Christmas she's ever had.

We spent a few minutes one morning looking at the list of things Phyllis requested and brainstorming other gift ideas. We also decided who was going to deliver the gifts. That was a fun morning. Kids were throwing out all kinds of crazy ideas. Many of the funniest came from one young man in particular: "Hey, you know how Cosmo has Cosmo Girl?? I wonder if they have Cosmo Granny?" Then, a few minutes later, he throws out this gem: "What about a brooch? Old ladies love that crap!"

One girl was adamant that whoever was going to buy the light bulbs MUST buy the Energy Star Compact Fluorescent bulbs because "they are a little more expensive, but the money you save in the long run is well worth it!"

Another young man shared that his grandma was the same age as Phyllis, and that she takes Tae-Kwon-Do lessons, did we think she might like that? Man, did we giggle that morning. But it was a great way to spend some time and do a little bonding! (Much to my chagrin and surprise, discussions of Christmas are far more popular than discussions of Hamlet. Oh well. Such is life. I'll take good discussion with kids wherever I can!)

Today, all the gifts had been purchased, and a few of my kids who finished their projects early were wrapping the gifts. Then we talked again about delivering the gifts. This is the part of Adopt-a-Family that I don't enjoy. It makes me intensely uncomfortable to go to a perfect strangers house and bring them stuff. I hate making small talk, especially with people I don't know. And what can you say in this situation? "So, tell me why you're living in city housing and needed help this Christmas?" I don't think so.

But because it is a school function, we have to have a chaperone for every 10 kids. I usually don't worry about that too much with seniors, though. I figure if they let me be in charge of 30 kids during class, I can handle a few more than 10 after school. It's a class bonding event, and I think it's important that I am there to share in the experience with my kids. I could just hand it over to a parent, but then I think both the kids and I lose out. So I suck it up every year and volunteer to "chaperone" and hope that some of my more outgoing kids sign up to help deliver. This year was looking promising. Four of my most boisterous and outgoing kids were going to go! Then, this morning, those four and two others all backed out on me.

I was so disappointed in them. I don't know why they backed out, but they did. While I was saddened by those six, I was thrilled with two of the young men in my class who stepped forward and picked up the slack. Instead of a merry group of 8, we were down to 4.

After school our class representative (the only one who didn't back out!), and the two fabulous young men who stepped up met me in my room, and we carried gifts out to their cars. Because it was just the four of us, we decided to drive separately so we could just leave from Phyllis' house to go home.

Somehow I was elected to be the leader of our little caravan, and we set off. It's sort of heartwarming how much faith they have in me...little do they know that I could get lost in a paper bag! While it's heartwarming, it's pretty scary at the same time how much trust they blindly put in me. But no worries, J was at home today so I called him really quick and had him MapQuest our route for me! Luckily it was in an area close to my home, so I was pretty confident I could get us there with no trouble.

When we arrived, there was another group there delivering to a family in the same building. We followed them after they got buzzed in, and then waited for the elevator. My kids were so cute. They are polite at school, but their manners kick into overdrive as soon as they leave the building. I've never had so many doors opened for me in my life!

The kids who came with me are seniors, and you would think they'd be confident and independent, but they were crowded around me like they're shy or something. (Come sit in my second hour class for 5 minutes and you'll know, they're NOT shy kids!) They were looking at me to be the brave one, even though I was dying on the inside. It's amazing what you can do when you put your mind to it, though, so I led the way.

I knocked on Phyllis' door, and when she opened it we said "Merry Christmas!" Man, as much as I hate going to strangers' houses, I'm not gonna lie - it's pretty gratifiying to see how amazed people are by a little bit of kindness. Her eyes welled up, and she said thank you about a million times. Then she wanted to know "you kids' names." The kids introduced themselves, and I introduced myself as their teacher. (I love it when people are surprised when I say I'm a teacher! It won't be very much longer that I look young enough to surprise them.) She complimented me on my fine young kids. It was nice for them to hear that, and I liked being able to brag on them for a bit right in front of them.

She was very grateful and appreciative. We made small talk for a few minutes, and then I tried to make excuses so we could leave. One of my poor kids is sick, and Phyllis smokes. As soon as we walked in, I knew he was going to be miserable the entire time we were there. His eyes were red and watery, and his nose started to run almost immediately, but he was a trouper. Right as we were getting ready to leave, though, the girl said, "Oh! I forgot the card in my car. Why don't you come with me? We'll be right back, we're just going to run to my car to get the card our whole class signed."

Crap. Now what am I going to do? I've got this great big giant of a kid (he is 6'6" and more than 200 pounds) who doesn't feel good, is attached to my hip, and hasn't opened his mouth other than to introduce himself, and the other two are ditching us. I've already used my quota of small talk up, and now I'm going to have to lead this discussion for the next five minutes or more. I really don't like this. But there's no way I can leave a student alone, and I can't have the young lady go to her car by herself, so I'm stuck.

Somehow I managed. The football player and I survived dreaded small talk with a very kind stranger, and as soon as the other two got back I said goodbye and led them to the door. Phyllis said thanks one more time, and wanted hugs from each of us, and then we were on our way.

Overall, it was a good experience, and I'm so proud of my kids my heart is just bursting. I'm proud to know such a fine young lady and young men. This is one of those memories I'll hold on to and bring out on those days I look at kids doing dumb things and wonder what the future is going to be like. The world can't be all bad with these three (and the others like them) in it.

Life is good, and I have much to be thankful for.

Heritage Recipe Collection

I've already talked about how crafty my MIL is, and how amazing. She really is, though I haven't found the right words to describe her. I used to refer to her as the "Martha Stewart of the South" which was fairly accurate for a while. Then Martha had to show her shady, evil, control-freak, bitchy side, and shatter all my illusions. But I could still refer to MIL as the "Martha Stewart of the South, only she's nicer than Martha."



Then good 'ol Martha went to prison for insider trading. Dammit, now I have to find another way to describe my MIL. Now references to Martha are not flattering at all.



In a recent post (Grandma Clara's Tea Cups), I showed off some artwork my MIL gave me. I also mentioned the recipe book she gave me in that post. This post is dedicated to that recipe book. It's a marvelous collection of family history. I've learned SO much about my husband's family while perusing the pages. It's fun.



Basically, Mom has been collecting family recipes, and creating scrapbook pages that include the recipe and the story behind the recipe. There are often pictures of the people, too. When H, my SIL, got married, Mom gave her a copy of the recipe book. I was SO jealous! My mom is awesome, but she doesn't do that kind of stuff. I was sad that I wouldn't have a piece of family history like that. When J and I got engaged, it never even crossed my mind that since I was joining the family I would be worthy of such a treasure. So when I received my very own copy in the mail right before a shower my friends threw for me, I cried. Literally. I was SO excited.



I look forward to the new additions every year. They are my favorite gift. Last Christmas (or maybe it was for my birthday), I was stunned when I opened it and found one of MY family recipes!! J and I hosted Thanksgiving for both of our sets of parents last year, and I made an egg nog pie using my maternal grandma's recipe. J's family loved it, and Mom H. asked me for the recipe. So I sent it to her. And she made me a page. How cool is that?? She keeps the original, and the rest of us get color copies.

Here are a few of the pages from the recipe collection.

Mom makes these cookies around Christmas usually. It's a great recipe, and an easy way to mass produce cookies for the neighbors!



One of Mom's first recipes from when she was a kid.



C takes the idea of a simple recipe to the extreme!



Television watching is just not the same during the holidays without Dad's famous T.V. Trash! (We've already been informed he's planning to make it this week before we arrive!)




And, last but not least, here's my Grandma Jene's Egg Nog Pie recipe!!


These are just five of more than 70 recipes in the best recipe collection on the planet. That woman is amazing! Though I have an incredible piece of history and a fantastic piece of art, I am still without a pithy phrase to describe my MIL and her mulitude of talents. Any suggestions??

It's bacon...sort of, but not really

Have you ever heard of Bacon Salt? If not, you are missing out. It's amazing! It is zero calories, zero fat, kosher certified, vegetarian seasoning salt that makes everything taste like bacon. No joke. It's AWESOME!

Apparently there were two guys, Justin and Dave, who both love bacon. Some may say they have an unnatural obsession with it. They put their heads together and came up with the idea of Bacon Salt. Some hard work and a bit of time later, they have three flavors available online and in many retail locations.

I first heard about it from my sister-in-law about a month and a half ago. She is a student at UW, and one of her roommates works at the Bacon Salt distribution center. (I'm not positive, but I think it's a Seattle-based company. It's manufactured in Issaquah.) C and her roommates love the stuff and use it on everything. When we went to visit her, she made sure we tried it. Now J and I are big fans, too. In fact, we got online to see where we could buy it, and there is a retail option right here in Kennewick! You're probably thinking it's sold at Safeway, or Yoke's Fresh Foods, but you're wrong. It's sold at Mirage Pool 'N Spas, of all places. (When J walked in to buy it, the guy at the counter asked how he had heard about it, so J told him. The guy helping J turned to his c0-worker and said, "I TOLD you we could sell salt here!" Can you imagine?? There's one believer at the store, and another who thinks his partner is crazy, nobody is going to buy that stuff at a pool supply store. Then J walks in solely to buy it after researching it on the web. How ironic!)

My sister is a vegetarian, and has not had bacon in close to 12 years. Of all meats, she misses bacon and roast beef the most. I can't do anything about the roast beef, but I can give her bacon back! In addition to the gift subscription to NetFlix that she requested, she's getting her very own bottle of Bacon Salt this Christmas.

The Bacon Salt slogan is that "Everything should taste like bacon." While I don't necessarily agree that everything should taste like bacon, some things should. Can you imagine the possibilities?

Bacon and eggs without the high calorie, high fat bacon?
Bacon on your baked potato without the crunchy, fake Bacon Bits?
Bacon on your salad?
Bacon flavored grilled meats?
Bacon flavored grilled cheese? (**This is a personal favorite of C and her roommates.)

Mmmm.....the possibilities are endless, really.

The website is http://www.baconsalt.com/. Check it out. The two inventors, Justin and Dave, call themselves "Bacontrepreneurs." How funny is that?

My personal favorite is the hickory, but all three flavors are great. I'll let you know how T likes it. If you try it, can you let me know??

Grandma Clara's Tea Cups

When my grandmother passed away a few years ago, my dad and his sisters decided that even though they didn't want to do it, they had to sell my grandma's house. This was the house she spent 86 of her 89 years in. She lived there as a child, moved out for three years when she and my grandpa got married, then returned to help take care of her father after her mom passed away. When my great-grandpa died a year or two later, Grandma and Grandpa stayed in that house and raised their own family there.

Needless to say, there was a LOT of stuff in that house. Stuff I had no idea Grandma even had or liked. One of the biggest surprises for me was her tea cups. Apparently Grandma collected them. Who knew? Well, maybe my cousins knew. I'm part of a HUGE family, and ever since my parent's divorce when I was in the third grade, I have spent relatively little time with that part of my family. I'm a pretty shy person, and in my giant family, I tend to try to blend in. I'm one of the youngest of 21 grandkids. Most of my cousins have kids...the oldest is just 6 or 7 years younger than I am.

Back to Grandma's tea cups. When my dad and the aunts and uncles were going through Grandma's stuff, they made sure that all of the 21 grandkids each got something from her house. I'm not sure what my sisters got at first, but my dad gave me a pretty copper tea kettle that was still in the box. I don't think he understood my mom when she told him to make sure he got each of us something from her house to remember her by. What she meant was that we should get an item that screams "I belonged to your Grandma Clara for a million years! Every time you use me or look at me, you will think of her fondly!"

Items like her ugly picture frames that sat on the console in the living room for fifty years. The afghan that rested on the back of the couch for as long as anyone can remember. The sentimental stuff. Not the stuff that was so new it was still in the box and she hardly had a chance to use it before she passed.

Once he understood that, Dad was really good about finding my sisters and I special items. So good, in fact, that I have a LOT of my Grandma's stuff now. A super cool, retro funky orange and green opalescent tea set. Six tacky juice glasses with gold leaf on them. Six pretty soup bowls that I use on practically a daily basis. The coolest lamp on the face of the planet (I'll post pictures at some point. That lamp is worthy of a post of its own. If Antiques Roadshow is ever in the Pacific Northwest, my sister-in-law and I are taking it and a Majolica box she got from her grandma.) A few tea cups. And, of course, the copper tea kettle.

Because Dad gave me the green and orange tea set, I told my sisters they could split up the 13 tea cups and saucers. They said that I could pick one, and then they would split the others. Because I am the only one with storage space right now (T lives with our mom, and L lives in Vegas for the time being), we labeled them all, and packed them into a box for me to bring home. Normally I am not a tea cup sort of girl. My MIL and both SIL are, though, so one time when Mom and Dad H were visiting, I had J pull down the box from the shelf in the garage so I could show them to Mom. She liked them so much, she wanted to take pictures of them so she could paint them for one of her upcoming art shows.

I was so touched. At first I thought she was just being nice, but a few months later, when we went to visit them, she had a present for me. She had framed prints of the three tea cups she painted for me. It was one of the coolest gifts I've ever received. (Oh!! The cookbook I got from her when J and I got married is another one of the coolest gifts! I'll have to do a post about that soon, too.) She told me I could do whatever I wanted with the prints, and that if I didn't want them, she wouldn't be offended. She doesn't like to force her artwork on anyone. You've got to be kidding me. If I had a fourth of the talent she has, I'd be showing my artwork to everyone I could! I'm considering giving my sisters each one of the prints, but I don't know if I want to part with them! Perhaps I'll ask Mom H. for two more sets of the prints, and I'll frame them for gifts for my sisters.


Here are the pictures of the tea cups.

Here are scans of the prints she gave me. They are amazing. They are almost better than the photographs. Her artwork is photo-realistic. And it's so good, it's hard to believe it's oil pastel and not a photograph.

Writer's Block

I have had writer's block for nearly a month now. I have ideas...I have topics...I have no words. I keep sitting down to work on my blog, and I keep getting distracted by other blogs that are so much fun to read, and so much better than mine. Who really wants to know about what's going on in my life? And, really, there's not much going on. There's never much going on. Nothing that's interesting, anyway.

I feel like such a hypocrite. I am an English teacher. I make kids write all the time. And I find myself sitting here whining the same things they do.

Life is funny that way.

They DO exist!!

I am SO ECSTATIC!! When we were at my in-laws' this Thanksgiving, we were making plans for the 2nd Annual Hocking Gingerbread House Build-off. My mom-in-law said we should make sure to take pictures during our building this year, so we have a record of the event. I mentioned that I was very sad that we didn't take them last year. We didn't have any record of our first, yet fabulous, attempts.



My mom-in-law said, "Oh, I took photos after y'all left!" (She's from Louisiana and has a cute little bit of a Southern accent still left! Well, it may be stronger than I think...I'm just used to it and don't even really hear it anymore. I don't hear my husband's accent at all, and he spent the first 20 years of his life in Texas. People tell me he has one, but I just can't hear it, much to his chagrin.)


But, without further ado, the photographic proof of the First Annual Hocking Gingerbread House Build-off!!! (As you are viewing the pictures, please remember that we all started with the SAME house kits and access to identical materials.)




The trophies J and I so lovingly crafted. (**See previous blog, "Pity Points Suck, Parts 1&2 for the story behind these trophies!)





The third place winners, Mom and Dad H.

Notice the color scheme?? It matches the barn they just finished building.

See the precision frosting work? Neat lines, even candy placement...

All sides of this house look fabulous!

See the replicas of Mom and Dad H.? The hat Dad is wearing is made from gum drops. As is the campfire. Sheesh. Mom's collar is made from jelly bean shavings. Seen here with their 3rd place trophy.

The second place winners, H and C (**who REALLY should have won in all honesty)

See the rock chimney? The "boulders"? The colored water? The realistic looking sand made from sugar? The palm trees made from individually cut chunks of dark chocolate painstakingly glued together with royal icing? The moss? The pot of flowers on the front porch??








They modified their house to make a beach bungalow. Holy crap.

With the 2nd place trophy.

And, the first place winners, J and I! (I repeat, PITY POINTS SUCK!)

Here with our first place trophy, proof that our family took pity on our poor, pathetic souls.

Remember when I said we had trouble with our frosting consistency and it looked like a very large and very sick bird had an accident on our roof?? Here's the proof I wasn't exaggerating. We had fun, no matter how crappy (pun intended!) our house turned out.

Here's hoping this year goes better!

Crafty Sunday

My friend's step-daughters are turning 10 and 12 in two weeks (their birthdays are two days apart), and I was invited to help plan their parties this year! How fun is that?

C is turning 12, and is going to host a Murder Mystery Party. It is set in the 1950's, and is going to be a blast! The game is an adult version (it's NOT adult dirty - it's just the regular version of the game, not a teen version), so Laurie and I are editing it for content. J and I are going to wear jeans and white shirts and our letterman jackets. My hair is too short for a ponytail, so I'll tie a scarf around my neck or maybe my hair. I'm trying to convince J that he should put a deck of cards in his shirt sleeve, but I'm not sure he's convinced yet.

I know, I know, I just posted an entire blog about how much I hate Halloween because you have to dress up. This doesn't feel like dressing up, though, because I wear jeans and t-shirts all the time. The only thing that's different is that I haven't worn my letterman jacket since high school. So this doesn't count as dressing up, really.

Anyway, back to the parties.

K is turning 10, and she is a bit of a girly girl. When Laurie asked K what kind of a theme she wanted for her party, she said, "Umm...shopping?" So shopping it is! We are going to take the kids to the mall for a scavenger hunt. The teachers in us, though, are going to make the clues puzzles they have to figure out. Then they'll have to find a store and pose for a picture in a particular way. (*The adult that travels with each team will have a camera...we are NOT going to set kids loose to run in the mall!) The winners will get a small gift card to Claire's or something like that. When we get back to Laurie's house for cake and ice cream, I'll print the pictures off, and we'll put them in these 4x6 brag books we found at Wal-Mart for $1.00 each! For $1 and the cost of some ink and paper, the girls are going to get pretty cool favors for the party!

When I found out that K wanted a shopping themed party, I got excited. One of my favorite cards to make is shaped like a purse! I volunteered to show her how to make them, and suggested we do that for invitations. Laurie loved the idea, and took home some samples to show K. She got really excited, too, so we set a crafting date for this morning.

As the week wore on, I thought about what kind of invitations we could do for C's party. In the shower on Wednesday morning I was struck with brilliance...we could use the template I use for the purse cards, and make it open on the side instead of at the top, and we could do poodle skirts! It was a brilliant idea. Not only is it so easy to make these cards that the girls could do it themselves, but they can be done very cheaply and look awesome.

We met at Craft Warehouse this morning, and the girls picked out their paper. We bought some glue and ribbon, and then headed home.

The girls' cards turned out SUPER cute. I don't have pictures of them, but I do have pictures of my originals that served as inspiration.

I'm looking forward to these parties...I don't mind small talk with kids!

The colors didn't turn out very well on this one. The handle looks almost black, but it's really a dusty blue sort of color. And it's hard to see the flap, but the first two cards open like a purse. The flap at the top opens, then the card opens vertically.

Though I like the first card, I think I like this black and white one better. The colors and the pattern are just really cute. (This card has the same flap and opens like the first one.)

When I thought about using the same template for the poodle skirt, all it took was a little cutting and pasting. I moved the "hinge" to the left side, and the "flap" to the right side. Now it opens like a regular card, but the flap holds it flat.

(Sorry it's not very straight...I couldn't get it to stay in one place in the scanner.)

These are a few of my favorite things...

Movies: I LOVE both Remember the Titans, and Steel Magnolias (If either of these movies are on television, I will stop no matter what part, and finish watching it. I don't own SM, but I do own RT. J gets so annoyed with me. I think if his eyes rolled any further back in his head, he'd go blind!)

Music: I like lots of music, but my preference is country. I love a lot of songs by a lot of different people, but when I look at my playlist on my iPod, I have more Tim McGraw and Rascal Flatts than anything else.

Food: My favorite type of food is Mexican. My favorite meal is my dad's homemade sauerkraut and zaia (green beans, potatoes, olive oil and raw garlic). Even though I can't cook much, I can cook these two dishes. Even J will eat them now! At first he was grossed out by the sauerkraut, but I convinced him to try it. I told him that because I eat Cajun food at his mom's house, he needed to at least try the food of my people!

Drink: My favorite soda is Pepsi, hands down. My favorite "hot" beverage is Vanilla Chai Tea or Eggnog Chai Tea. (Hot is in quotes because I don't drink hot beverages...I let them cool down. I joke that I don't drink hot chocolate, I drink lukewarm chocolate!)

Smell: Fresh laundry! There's nothing better than warm, freshly laundered clothes, straight out of the washing machine.

Color: Blue! I love a LOT of colors, though. There are certain color combinations that just speak to me. And there's no rhyme or reason to it. I love autumnal colors, and I love lime green and teal together. I love blue and brown together, but I also love black and white. The only thing that all my favorite colors and color combinations have are intensity. I like rich, saturated colors more than I like pastels. Sometimes pastels speak to me, but it's more of a whisper.

Season: Fall / Winter are my favorite seasons without a doubt. Though I do like summers better now that we have a pool, it gets TOO hot here. When we hit 112 last summer, I was sure I knew what Hell feels like. And if that isn't incentive to lead a good life, I don't know what is!

Craft store: Craft Warehouse is my favorite craft store. It is a little more spendy than Michael's, and they don't have that cool 40% off coupon, but their stuff just speaks to me. And they have a HUGE scrap booking section while our Michael's is a little more wimpy.

Toothpaste: Crest Extra Whitening Extreme Herbal Mint. I don't use anything else if I can help it. I travel with my own toothpaste. My husband and I use different kinds, so we take our own toothpaste, even if we are just going for a weekend somewhere and share a toiletries bag. I'll use his toothbrush, but I won't use his toothpaste unless I have no other options.

Dessert: Creme brulee is the food of the gods. It's a yummy treat that I rarely get to have. I also like cheesecake with fruit topping. I think chocolate ruins cheesecake.

Sport to watch: Though I will go to a professional sports game, or watch it on television, I much prefer to watch high school sports, or even younger. (In fact, I just spent my Saturday watching my friend's daughters play basketball.) My favorites are football, basketball, baseball, and wrestling, in that order. I HATE soccer, golf and tennis. (Little kid soccer is okay...big kid soccer gets boring.) Every once in awhile I enjoy watching a good hockey game or volleyball match.

Book: WAY too many to count. Some that have stayed consistently high on my list are To Kill a Mockingbird and Hamlet.

From the mouths of babes, part 2

1. One of my reading students three years ago was from Mexico. He spoke pretty decent English, but sometimes slang or idioms just confuse non-native speakers. E was a happy sort of fellow, and came in every morning with a big smile on his face. I never saw him mad, sad, upset, etc. He was always happy. One morning, though, he looked pretty stressed.

When I talked to him, he didn't smile. I told him, "My, E, you are in a mood this morning!" and we went about our business.

About ten minutes later, E came up to me and in a low voice said, "Excuse me, Miss? You think I am in the mood?"

I don't know who blushed more...me or E!


2. In reading class last year, one of my kids was singing a song, and one of my adult EAs (Educational Assistants) started to dance in her seat. A boy noticed, and said "Go Miss! Bust a move!! Just don't bust a hip!"


3. My first year of teaching, my juniors were reading The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. I had them working in groups on an assignment when cute blonde C called me over. "Miss P.?? Was it World War 1 or World War 2 that ended slavery?"

I looked at her in shock. D gently patted my shoulder and said, "Don't worry, Miss P., I'll handle it for you." I nodded dumbly and just walked away.


4. One of my freshmen this year is head over heels in love with Zac Effron of High School Musical fame. When she found out that two of the new students in our class were from California, the first words out of her mouth were: "Do you think they know Zac?!?! Do you think they'll introduce me??!!!"


5. Also during my first year of teaching, one of my darling freshman boys raised his hand and asked me, "Can you eat Chapstick?"

I was a little surprised by the question, but told him that though I thought it was disgusting, I didn't think it would do any harm. It's non-toxic after all. About five minutes later, I heard a girl in the back of the room shout, "Eww!!! That's gross! Now you owe me $1.88!!"

I had to try not to laugh as I told J "I thought you were going to eat your own Chapstick! NOT someone else's!"

My step-dad thought this was so funny, that when he was over here visiting and he and J went to the grocery store, he came home with a three-pack for my student. John told me to tell him it was an after school snack.

10 Reasons Why I Hate Halloween

10. I HATE to dress up.

9. Sugar makes kids crazy...and they are already crazy enough!

8. Kids, girls especially wear entirely inappropriate outfits, and I have to fight dress code violations all day at school.

7. I don't like parties. A few close friends getting together for dinner and games or a movie is a blast. Making small talk at a party with someone you don't know sucks.

6. I HATE to dress up.

5. I get sad to see old, moldy Jack O'lanterns on the side of people's houses in the days following. And, pumpkin guts are gross. I don't want to see them or smell them all over my neighborhood.

4. Dead things should stay dead. (To quote my sister-in-law, H.) A holiday that compels people to dress up like zombies, or fake horrendous injuries is not cool in my book.

3. Toilet paper, shaving cream, and eggs belong inside houses, not ON houses.

2. I HATE to dress up.

And the number one reason I hate Halloween...


1. I do not enjoy being scared. I don't watch scary movies, I don't read scary books. I have an overactive imagination. I don't enjoy it while it's happening, and I really don't enjoy the nightmares afterwards. My first real "date" in high school was to go see the movie "Seven" with Brad Pitt, and then we went to a Haunted House. Man, I must have liked that guy! (And, no, Leah, if you don't remember who I went with, I'm sure not going to remind you...it was not one of my finer moments! I'm afraid you'll look him up in your yearbook and then you'll die laughing. I don't want to be the one responsible for leaving your kids without their mom. That "relationship" did not last very long at all. A few weeks and I hated him... A hint: he was on the newspaper staff with me, and staying at his house until 4a.m. one weekend is what made my mom finally give me a curfew senior year.)

Mama! It's Mr. Simmons!

My in-laws were here over the weekend, and as usual, we had a good time. We have some of the most interesting conversations! My particular favorite is when I learn more about J when he was a little kid. At one point this morning J was teasing his mom for having a Jane Fonda workout record when he was a kid. She told him not to laugh, because he used to love workouts...but not with Jane Fonda. He loved Richard Simmons!


Apparently when he was about three years old, their typical routine was to eat lunch, and then at one o'clock they would go into the living room and turn on the television. J LOVED "Mr. Simmons!! It's Mr. Simmons, Mama!" He would laugh and sing and dance alone to Sweatin' to the Oldies with his friend, Richard Simmons. He loved how energetic and happy Mr. S always was.


Then, when J got older, his obsession with Mr. Simmons faded. Now, J has none of his old affection for his workout friend...he is more scornful than anything.

Here's a picture of J at about 3...look how cute he was! That blonde curly hair just kills me!

Poor kitty...

Last week I took both Sid and Zoe to the vet. I had Friday off, and they were both overdue for their shots. I called that morning, and got them an appointment for the afternoon. Things went well at first. Sid walked right into his crate and all I had to do was close the door. Zoe, on the other hand, HATES to go in the crate and will fight with all her might to avoid it. I managed to trick her, though. I put the crate in the bathroom in the bathtub and shut the curtain. She likes to cuddle with me when I am using the bathroom, so I put down the toilet seat and sat down. I called her, and she came running. The dummy didn't even register that I had my pants pulled up. I closed the door behind her and then stood up. When I opened the shower curtain she was not happy with me. I think she knew she'd been had. She put up minimal struggle and I got her in. Then we were on our way.

They both "sing" in the car...I hate it. They sound like they are being lead to their death. And one sets the other off, and it's like they can't even hear my voice...they just keep crying until we get there. It wasn't too bad this time, though, until...

Sid had an accident in his crate on the way to the vet. It's the second time that's happened to him. I feel so bad when it happens, but there's not much I can do about it. You can let a dog outside and tell him to take care of business, but a cat sure doesn't do that. The vet techs were super, though, and cleaned him up as soon as we got there. He was being such a good boy that they went ahead and gave him a bath instead of just drying him off.

They commented on how sweet my cats were, and how well they tolerated being poked and prodded and didn't protest at all. No meowing, growling, hissing, or spitting.

Then the vet and recommended a pill that prevents worms. I said sure, so the vet tech went and got the pills and her nifty pill dispenser that prevents cat bites. Of course Zoe had to go first, and of course she couldn't continue to be a good cat...she had to show off for me and Sid, and spit out the pill. Not once, not twice, and not three times but four times. The tech gathered her supplies and Zoe and went into the back room for reinforcements. Turns out it wasn't necessary...she really was just showing off for us. The tech was able to get her to take both pills without struggle in the back room. Go figure.

She received a clean bill of health and then we let her crawl back into the cage she HATES at home but LOVES at the vet, and it was Sid's turn. He did great. He, too, got a clean bill of health with one exception: his teeth. They were in bad need of a cleaning. I've been noticing that he has really bad breath, and figured it was time for a teeth cleaning. Unfortunately, those are pretty spendy.

But, if it needs to be done, it needs to be done. I agreed, and set an appointment for the following Friday.

J dropped him off in the morning before 8 on his way to work. They kept him all day for this procedure. I couldn't go get him until 5 p.m. Poor Zoe was home alone all day. She was certainly lonely because when I got home, she was waiting for me by the door. She hasn't done that since we got Sid. She followed me around the house and wanted me to cuddle her. She doesn't do that usually, either. I left to go get Sid before J got home. When he got home, Zoe was all over him, too.

The strange part was when I brought Sid home. He was still a little groggy from the anesthesia, and wasn't acting like himself. He must smell like the vet, too, because Zoe won't come near him. If he tries to get near her, she growls and hisses at him. It's been 24 hours now, and poor Sid is still being shunned by Zoe. It's almost as if she doesn't know who he is.

He had a heck of a day yesterday, and then came home to that. Poor guy. He did great at the vet, though, and his teeth look great. His breath smells better, too!

Here are some pictures of his experience:

When he got home he immediately started chewing on the bandage that was on his arm, so I took it off before I got a picture of it. Here's where they had to shave his arm to put in the IV.

Here's the before picture from the vet of his teeth. It seems like it's hard to see, but it turns out that his teeth were REALLY gross.

Here's the after. Nice and clean and pearly white again!

Here's the toothbrush they sent home with him. Yeah, right. Like I'll be able to brush my cat's teeth. I'll let you know how it goes! We're supposed to give his gums 10 days to heal before we try it.

Here's the dental "chew" they sent home. It's coated with cat toothpaste. They gave me two. Both cats ate it right up. I think I may have to get some of those and see if after they get used to the taste of those they'll be more inclined to let me brush their teeth.

Here's the t/d food they sent home. They LOVE this stuff. J and I have been giving it to them as "treats" for two years now. My cats are dumb. Because Zoe has food allergies and intestinal issues, we have to be careful about what we feed them. So we put either their plain dry food in a treat can, or the t/d. They don't get real treats, they get t/d or z/d (their regular food) from a can, but they LOVE it. My friend tells me I have the dumbest cats on the planet. I figure it's like telling a little kid carrots are a special treat and giving them veggies instead of candy, right? It's better for them, and if they think they're getting a treat, they are.

Here's the bandanna they sent home with Sid. Thankfully they didn't put it on him. I think the fabric is super cute, but I think bandannas on cats look stupid.

I would take a picture of Zoe being mean to Sid, but I can't catch them with the camera, and I don't want to make Sid get hissed at any more than he's already dealing with it. But here's Zoe keeping an eye on the situation, making sure Sid doesn't get too close to me or get too much attention she feels is rightfully hers...

UPDATE: My cats now hate each other. Actually, that's not true. Zoe hates Sid. She has started two full fledged fights with him now. They didn't even do that when we first brought him into the house. They sniffed each other, were wary for a day or two, and have been best friends ever since. Until Friday, that is. It's now after midnight on Saturday, so it's technically Sunday, and she is still hissing and spitting whenever he comes near. Poor Sid is traumatized. He just wants to cuddle, and she won't let him come near. Brat. I've now got food and water and a litter box in the extra room, and have locked Zoe up. According to the internet, it will take a few days to "reintroduce" them to each other. AARRGGHHH!!! Why do cats have to be so dumb?? From now on, they will go everywhere together. Even if I have to pay extra. Just so they are always together and always exposed to the same smells. That's the only thing we can think is wrong...he smells like the vet.

Update 2: It took almost an entire week to the day for the cats to start getting along again, but they are now just as close as they were before the fateful trip to the vet. We did have to lock Zoe up when we went to work for a few days, but it was okay in the long run. Yay! They love each other again.

Mother knows best

When it comes to cleaning there seem to exist three different personality types: those who purge often and mercilessly, those who keep some things for sentimental reasons but get rid of the rest of the junk, and those who keep everything because they "might need it some day." Who knows how or why anyone ends up in each particular category.





In my own family we cover all three personality types. My sister T definitely falls into the first category, she purges on a regular basis, and when items are gone, they are not missed. My other sister L tends to be in the second category. She keeps a small amount of items for sentimental reasons, but then will periodically purge. I wish I was in the first category, would proudly claim the second, but would have to admit that I sometimes find myself hanging on to stuff "just in case." It's probably a 70/30 split between the two categories. I am pretty good about getting rid of stuff, but sometimes have to do a big purge. I have seen what happens when you live in the third category, as both of my biological parents do, and it's a scary place to be! My mom is more a sentimental saver while my dad is just cheap.




Both my mom and dad's houses are jam packed with stuff, and I don't want my house to be like that. Unfortunately, my husband tends to be a bit of a saver, too. On the other hand, while he claims to be observant (he is a scientist, you know... :) ), he doesn't seem to notice when I get rid of stuff periodically. Sometimes he does notice, but usually he doesn't complain because I think he's glad I just did it myself instead of hassling him to help me.



When I was visiting my mom last year sometime, I ended up sleeping in her "sewing room" on the futon. On the desk in that room was lots of junk, as is to be expected, but there was also something else... Somehow, a note that Mom left for a babysitter when we were little has survived unscathed through several moves and many years. It appears to be a note that she left for someone who was watching us for the whole weekend. I am three and a half years older than L, and in the note it appears she is walking and talking, and was recently potty trained. Mom couldn't remember when the note was written, but we're guessing I was 4.5-5, which would make T 3-3.5 and L 1-1.5. Unfortunately Mom also doesn't remember who our babysitter was. If she had to guess, she thinks it was probably her mom, my Grandma Jene, but she's not sure. We're guessing it was if not the first time, one of the first times we were left with someone for any length of time. The notes are VERY thorough, and a great snapshot of what we were like when we were little!! It's also a neat look at my mom when she was younger...we always knew my sisters and I inherited our "gift of gab" from Mom and not Dad, but apparently Mom was a writer, too!


Here's a picture of us at close to the ages we probably were when Mom wrote the note.

Here's the LENGTHY and DETAILED note!

More cute pictures of me and my sisters:

Me and T. Apparently I climbed into her crib one day when she was getting up from a nap.

I'm wearing the same outfit here, but T is in something else...did I make a habit of climbing into her crib?? Who knows...

Don't we look thrilled to be posing for this picture?? Look closely at the pictures on the mantel behind us...Mom liked to get a lot of mileage out of our outfits!

We're a little younger here, but it's one of few pictures of us with my mom's mom, Grandma Jene. I loved my "Green Grandma"!! (My favorite color was green, and anything that was special to me I called "Green"...my green blankie, my Green Grandma...)

While this is probably one of my all-time favorite pictures of me and my sisters, it's got to be one of the craziest! Who poses their children in the bathtub with flowers?? Random. But that's my mom!