Wink. Wink.

One of my darling freshmen girls hurried to catch up with me while we were walking to an assembly the other day. She had a question she needed to know the answer to.

C: "Mrs. H? I was wondering..."

Me: "Yes, C?"

C: "Well, is it possible to wink with both eyes at the same time?"

Me: "Yes. I believe it's called 'blinking.'"

Man, I love my job.

You'd think I would have learned

I've been "doing poetry" with my seniors for about four weeks now, give or take a few days for crazy schedules and Silent Reading Fridays. They are SO ready to be done. I, on the other hand, find I really enjoy reading poetry and talking to people about it - even if they are 17 and not terribly fond of it. We've read all sorts of things, and even incorporated a few songs into the mix. I'm especially proud of the pairing of "To an Athlete Dying Young" by Housman with "Candle in the Wind" by Elton John. I exposed those stinkers to a great poem (with some pretty tough vocab / syntax) AND a great song! They had good discussion in spite of themselves.

Ahh. The power I wield as a teacher is exhilarating! Whether they like Elton John or hate him, they had to listen to him because (are you ready for this??) I said so.

But I digress. Today we did a review for the test they will take tomorrow. Yesterday we spent the entire period discussing three of their terms: assonance, consonance, and alliteration. All three of these terms are very similar, so I thought we should spend some time identifying each of them in a poem so my kids could understand it better.

In case you aren't current with your poetry terminology, here are the definitions for you:

Assonance is the repetition of vowel sounds in the middle or at the end of words close to each other in a line or lines of poetry.

Consonance is the repetition of consonant sounds in the middle or at the end of words close to each other in a line or lines of poetry.

Alliteration is the repetition of consonant or vowel sounds at the beginning of words close to each other in a line or lines of poetry.

Got it?

They didn't.

Well, to be fair, first and third hours did a pretty good job of it. For the review I created a PowerPoint presentation. One slide had the definition of the word, the next had the word itself on it. I would show them the definition, and they each wrote what word they thought it was on a mini-whiteboard and held it up so I could see. (This is a GREAT method for review, by the way! Kids LOVE to write on the whiteboards, everyone gets to participate rather than the same one or two kids yelling out all the answers, and I can see at a glance how many kids "get it" and how many kids are clueless.)

So even though first and third hours did pretty well, sixth hour really seemed to struggle. Ever the helpful one (that is what they pay me for after all), I thought I would give them an easy way to remember the difference between the words.

I said, "Assonance is the repetition of what kind of sounds?"

They said, "Vowels."

I said, "That's right. And where is the repetition again?"

They said, "In the middle or at the end of words."

I said, "You got it. Here's an easy way to remember it. Assonance is the repetition of vowel sounds. What does assonance start with?"

I was hoping they'd say, "A." Because then I planned to say, "That's right and 'a' is a vowel."

After almost ten years of teaching, you'd think I would have anticipated what they did say. But I didn't.

When I said, "What does assonance start with?" three of my most helpful boys loudly replied in unison, "ASS!"

When will I learn?

Blue Tarp Camping

If you've grown up in the Pacific Northwest like me, there's nothing more to say. This video says it all.

Relentless Recycler

Too funny, and too true! My dad could give this lady a run for her money. In fact, my sisters and I got him the t-shirt for Father's Day last year.

Socks and sandals

The Pemco Northwest Profiles are pretty dang funny. And it's scary how many of these people I know! Though they are transplants to the Pacific Northwest, both my father-in-law and J fit this profile.

The joy of teaching

This conversation happened today during sixth hour. One of my senior boys, let's call him G, wanted to know if I could recommend a book for him. Books I can recommend, but I need to know what someone likes to read so I can think of something tailored to his/her interests. I'm not trying to brag or anything, but I've got a bit of a reputation amongst the high school set for being able to find the "best" books for them to read.

Okay, so I am bragging, but you need to know that so you can truly appreciate the conversation G and I had.

G approached me at the beginning of class and asked me, “Mrs. Hocking? Can you recommend a book for me? I have a track meet tomorrow and I need a new book.”

I replied, "Sure, G. What do you like to read?”

G said, “I will read anything. I like to read all kinds of things.”

I said, “Okay. Do cuss words offend you in a book?”

G, “No.”

Me, “Okay, well, Chris Crutcher wrote a book about running. It’s called Ironman. He used to teach around here, and all his stuff is set in Eastern Washington and Northern Idaho.”

G, “Oh, I don’t read sports books.”

Me, “Really? So you meant to say, ‘I’ll read anything except sports books,’ right?”

G, “Yes.”

Me, “Have you read Animal Farm?”

G, “I don’t read George Orwell. My other English teacher made me read 1984 and I didn’t understand it. I don’t like books about government. Why does he write about government and politics?”

Me, “Animal Farm is different, but okay. How about a book called The Gospel According to Larry? It’s about a kid who wants to get the attention of a girl he likes so he starts a website, but then it goes viral and he gets national attention. He starts to make a difference in more ways than he could have ever imagined.”

G, (shaking his head before I’m even finished talking), “No, that sounds like politics. And also I don’t read books about girls.”

Me, “Okay, so you really meant, ‘I don’t read sports books or political books or books about girls,’ then, right? How about science fiction? Do you do science fiction? Ender's Game is a really good book about a boy who has to save the planet.”

G, “Yes. Wait, how long is it? I don’t read books that are more than 250 pages.”

Me, “For someone who will read anything, your list is getting very specific about what you won’t read. How about the Cirque du Freak books, have you read any of those?”

G, “I don’t read series books.”

Me, “G, what DO you read?”

G, “Anything. Do you have a recommendation for me?”

At this point in the conversation, several of his classmates burst into loud laughter in the middle of silent reading. I'm pretty sure they were laughing at me and my gluttony for punishment.

Me, “I think you should read Ender’s Game. I think you would like it.”

G, “Can I see the cover? That’s how I usually pick books.”

Me, “Nope. When you ask me for suggestions you don't get to choose by the cover.”

I wrote him a list of four titles I thought he should look into, and sent him off to the library. Do you think he came back from the library with any of them?

No, he did not. He apparently looked at the cover of Ender's Game but decided it wasn't to his liking. So he grabbed the first one off the shelf that had a cover he liked. He’s using the sticky note with the list of titles I gave him as a bookmark.

Sometimes I have a hard time not beating my head against a brick wall. Or concrete…that’s more plentiful around here.